Aging Expectations

Changes

It's time for changeYou may have noticed, I haven’t posted in quite a long time. There’s a few good reasons for that – aren’t there always good reasons for things. At least from the person who is doing the explaining. The person doing the explaining believes the reasons are always good, valid, upstanding, and easily understood. To those listening, things may not seem so clear.

Either way, here are the top three reasons I have not posted:

1. I have given up my writing career.

The gasps of horror! Yes, it’s true. I realized that although I may be a good writer, I don’t think I’m a GREAT writer. Well, that’s not entirely true. I kinda think I am a great writer but it seems other people don’t necessarily agree.

Although my blog did garner a lot of traffic at its high points, it seemed that I was “selling out.” Posting for money, which I guess seems like the real end game but it felt dirty. I didn’t like it. And, when I wrote for just myself (and I thought others) it wasn’t as well received as I would have liked.

I also had my travel tip book (hey, it’s still for sale, if you’re interested). Here’s the thing with that…writing a book and selling a self-published book are two entirely different things. While I might believe I’m a great writer, I KNOW I am not a great salesperson, especially when it comes to selling myself. This should be a class in school. Seriously, selling yourself is probably the most important part of life.

I also wrote two fiction books. Yes, two! I sent them to a few agents with no luck. Now granted I didn’t send them to a ton of agents but here’s something else I know about myself, I do not like rejection. Of course, duh, who likes rejection. But, I really don’t do well with it. There are obviously others who deal with it, continue to persist, and create amazing success. That’s not me and guess what, that is okay.

2. I needed time to come to terms with agreeing to forgo a dream.

While it’s great that I made a decision, what’s not great is how giving up on a dream actually feels. There are a lot of people in the world who say: go for it, live your dreams., you’ll never know until you try, if you just take a chance it can work, etc., etc. etc. I agree with them. I still agree with them.

Most people don’t take that advice because they are afraid of trying and…failing. That would be a fate worse than death. Well, I’m here to tell you, it is not a fate worse than death but it is not easy to accept. It’s not easy to agree you can’t do something and you’re no longer willing to try. I’m here to tell you though that when you do step out of your safe box and it doesn’t work, life can go on and you can still be a happy successful person – just in a different way that you thought, and that my friends, is what takes time.

The great thing is when you give yourself that time, you can generate a new dream. A better dream! It’s like falling in love. It gives you the kind of excitement you remember from your first dream – before any disappointment set in – before you really got to know the dream and realized that maybe you and the dream just weren’t right for each other. But there’s a new love on the scene and you believe this time it’s going to work!

3. I’m in love with my new dream.

After letting go of my writing dream, I did a lot of soul searching. I thought about who I am, what I’m good at, what I believe in, what I can give, what would make me happy, and more. I’m very interested in psychology. I’m very interested in aging. I LOVE to travel.

After a lot of serious consideration, I am going back to school to earn my degree in psychology. I’m going to go on to get my masters (or maybe my doctorate). I want to specialize in the psychology of aging, specifically how people’s perspectives on aging effect how successfully they age. I’ve got a second part to the dream, which I’m not ready to share yet but if the first part works, it will be a-mazing!

So, why am I back here writing?

Because even though I’ve given up the dream of being a professional writer, I still love to write. I missed not doing it. One of my classes this semester was Research Methods. It deals with how research, specifically psychology research, is contrived, carried-out, and communicated. It’s such an informative class. One very exciting piece of the class is the access to literary databases filled with literature on research already completed.

In fact, I found very specific research already conducted related to exactly what I want to study…I didn’t say it was an original idea. Anyway, these research papers are pretty long and a little hard to understand without the necessary background. What I decided to do was take one of these papers (my goal is one per week) and analyze it, summarize it, give my humble opinion on what it means to an everyday person, and share it here. Everything I love rolled into one, except the travel bit, which is odd considering this site is called Happy Family Travels.

Anyway, I’m diligently working on the first paper, so get ready for some cool information to come about happily increasing the length of your life!

 

The mall in Central Park by Anthony Quintano is licensed under CC BY HappyFamilyTravels.

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